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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29952765">Love is Hard</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heaven_Help_Me/pseuds/Heaven_Help_Me'>Heaven_Help_Me</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chinese Mythology, Original Work</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adorable, Alternate Universe - Gods &amp; Goddesses, Ancient China, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Flirting, Chinese Mythology &amp; Folklore, Courtship, Creation Myth, Demons, Dragons, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Feral Behavior, Flirting, Fluff, Genderfluid Character, Gossip, Homophobia, Humor, M/M, Matchmaking, Misunderstandings, Monsters, Mythical Beings &amp; Creatures, Mythology - Freeform, Naga, Pining, Rabbits, Rating May Change, Sassy, Sea Monsters, Shapeshifting, Sleep Deprivation, Suicide Attempt, Temporary Character Death, Tigers, Underworld, Vacation, Work</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 00:59:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,605</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29952765</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heaven_Help_Me/pseuds/Heaven_Help_Me</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The Rabbit God has helped young men find the love of their lives for centuries. He's watched every adorable,  heart melting  moment, guided them to happily ever afters and tied red strings day after day. Well he's sick of it. He hasn't been in love since he was a mortal. From this point on Tu'er Shen is on strike until he finds himself a husband. Unfortunately for him it'll be harder than he thinks. From blind dates, lovesick immortals, and scary suitors, maybe he'll find that the love of his life isn't who he thought it would be.<br/>Well, a love god's work is never done.</p>
<p>Update Schedule (Once a month)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tu'er Shen/Baihu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I originally wrote Love is Hard to be a book. But as a I continued writing I felt disheartened like it wasn't serious enough to be a real book. But I love this story and am super attached to the characters. I wanted someone to enjoy it. </p>
<p>Love is Hard is based on the premise of a real Chinese God. The Rabbit God or better known as the God of homosexuality.  His story ends in tragedy. I wasn't satisfied with that. This is my version of events.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The rabbit god swung his feet daintily back and forth over the ledge of the rooftop, sweat dripping down the corner of his nose. His head was throbbing and his skin felt prickly and hot. </p>
<p>He stretched himself into a cute little mewl of a yawn and blinked bearily. The sun was still curled in the blanket of night but soon it would be wiggling it's fingers and toes in the first signs of dawn.</p>
<p>Tu'er Shen had been working tirelessly for the past few days. It was spring, his busiest season, and love was in the air. Perhaps too much love if you asked him. </p>
<p>He hadn't slept in a couple of days and honestly it was kind of getting to him. It seemed like everyone and their 3rd uncle was hooking up with someone.</p>
<p>Another yawn slipped from his lips and he pinched his own cheeks to keep awake. All was quiet on the streets. It was too early for most people to be awake. Unfortunately most people were not a rather sexually promiscuous Eunuch who he's been trying to matchmake for the better part of a month. </p>
<p>Said eunuch was stowed away in the nook of an alley with his newest lover. Settled firmly in the embrace of a plain looking monk ,aggressively sucking face. It was disgusting to watch. Even worse they kept making noises and saying things.</p>
<p>"Oh! Oh! Yeah, like that. Do it again."<br/>
It was awful. </p>
<p>A forlorn and traumatized look passed Shen's face. "Great, now they're dry humping." He muttered dejectedly. "Being a love god is hard."He complained to himself. </p>
<p>Some people needed help with their love lives, he knew that, but this man had to have the worst taste in men Shen's ever seen in his life. He had zero standards and zero self respect.</p>
<p>Tu'er Shen squinted moodily at the enthusiast couple. The little eunuch's red string was connected to this monk's closest friend down at the monastery. Under no circumstances stances could they have sex. Ever.</p>
<p>Seductively mouthing at the column of the monks throat, the eunuch curled himself closer to his lover. They were getting louder.<br/>
"Babe, just like that. So good for me."</p>
<p>Shen grimaced. "Well, that's enough of that." He said decidedly. Flicking his fingers lazily in the horny couples’ direction, a tendril of the rabbit god's power hit the monk. They both froze. The eunuch was the first one to speak.</p>
<p>"You're not hard anymore. " </p>
<p>The monk shifted awkwardly. "Er...no"</p>
<p>A dangerous look entered the eunuch's eyes. "Am I that unattractive to you?"</p>
<p>Panicking, the monk frantically began speaking. "Of course not! You're like a flower. Very beautiful. How could I not be attracted to you?"</p>
<p>With a vaguely unimpressed look, the eunuch untangled himself from the monk." Unbelievable." He muttered dispassionately. The monk reached out for him. </p>
<p>"Don't touch me," The eunuch snapped. "This was clearly a mistake." And walked away.</p>
<p>The monk stared blankly after him. He looked down at his limp dick. "Of all times to fail me. Really? You have one job."</p>
<p>Shen almost felt bad. He'd cockblocked the little eunuch at least twelve times this month. The mortal was probably starting to get frustrated. But Tu'er Shen had arranged for him to meet his soulmate today. They'd be good together. Smooth out each other's edges.</p>
<p>Shen sighed, relieved his work was over and gave himself a mental pat on the back for a job well done. Another yawn stretched itself from his mouth. Maybe just a quick doze on the rooftop. He crawled up the roof and found a nice flat spot. Letting the comforting thought sleep seduce him, he curled up and let his eyes drift close. Finally, he could get some shut eye.</p>
<p>Dawn arrived. </p>
<p>"COCK A DOODLE DOO." Screeched a rooster. Doors snapped open and shut with resounding thuds. Workers began dragging their wares down to the market for sale. A great hubbub of thunks and clunks, pitters and patters, jingles and jangles, accompanied by the dreaded chitter chatter all assaulted him at once. The rabbit god's headache upgraded from throbbing to skull splitting. </p>
<p>He refused to open his eyes . Who knew when he'd be able to close them again. Something pinched the flesh of his cheek. </p>
<p>Poke. He ignored it. Poke....Poke. Poke. Poke.</p>
<p>One eye peaked open. A bird. One of his - a divine messenger of his temple. He groaned despairingly. She cooed and nuzzled his cheek. She was beautiful. A fairy-bluebird and no less lovely for being a female. A scroll was rolled up in her talons. He plucked it from her grip and began to read. </p>
<p>More work. </p>
<p>An endless line of mortal prayer spelled out in black and white. Shen stroked her pale blue feathers affectionately. She made a pleased noise. "Mortals aren't going to fall in love themselves. Time to get back to work." Groaning, he propped himself up and squinted at the rising sun. The bird only cocked her head and flew off into the morning buzz.</p>
<p>🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐰🐇🐯🐰🐇🐯🐰🐇</p>
<p>Time was a burning thing. A splintering rage that coiled and never came undone. Sometimes he couldn't see for it. All the centuries spent in the fiery haze of eternity had burned his eyes from sight. He couldn't understand the pittering of mortality anymore. The rabbit god tried to remember what it was like when he was a man. He tried to remember when he was less than a man. A frail boy caught in the claws of poverty. Much of that time was lost to him.</p>
<p>But he could grasp the little that he remembered and understand better than he would have before. That helped him help others. Some mortals were harder to understand. He found there were certain brands of crazy that he had a harder time wrapping his brain around. But nothing was as bad as a mom. Those bitches were psycho.</p>
<p>He'd spent the last three hours locked up in a room with two mothers, their husbands, and the local matchmaker. A marriage was being brokered between the two families.</p>
<p>On the left side was a middle aged woman in a periwinkle hanfu. Modest makeup colored her cheeks and reddened her lips. A soft spoken woman in all things except her first born son. Her lips were downturned in displeasure. A stern countenance hardening her features. Only the best bride for her baby boy.</p>
<p>Her husband hadn't said a word the whole time. He only stood behind her looking tired. Sometimes he'd get an eye twitch when his wife got too worked up.</p>
<p>Settled by her husband's side was the second mother. Her husband had an arm bracketed around her tiny waist. This was probably less affectionate and more to keep her from lunging across the room, tearing the other woman's face off.</p>
<p>She was a wisp of a woman. Dolled up in pretty pinks and pastel purples, Tu'er Shen was convinced the devil was in that woman. Every once in a while her face would scrunch up in a hellish fury. Her daughter deserved a husband who would uphold the family honor and take care of her. Not some flimsy boy who painted nobels for work.</p>
<p>Neither woman was willing to compromise and nothing could make them happy but perfection for their children. What they didn't know was that their kids where about as gay as gay got.</p>
<p>Dongmei (the daughter) was having an affair with a married woman. They'd been together for 3 years now. Domgmei, even looked after her kids sometimes. And as for Honqi (the son), he was pining pathetically after a handsome merchant. He knew the long winded crush was overdue an end but couldn't bring himself to let go.</p>
<p>For them this was perhaps the only match that could make them happy. They'd fulfill their filial duty of bearing children but see their prospective lovers in peace. A marriage of convenience.</p>
<p>Tu'er Shen huffed grouchily. Marriage negotiations were the worst. The matchmaker was an elderly thing, always smelling too strongly of incense and sugar. She sat sagely behind her desk,wrinkles folding over wrinkles. She'd been a miracle worker in her field about twenty years ago, but now she was simply too old to function. The poor thing could barely hear and for the most part ignored the women's bickering to look over the future couple's horoscope. </p>
<p>She hummed, a crinkled smile tugging her withered lips. The mothers stopped their fussing for a minute.</p>
<p>"What is it Aunty?" Demurred periwinkle mother.</p>
<p>The matchmaker only frowned. "What'd you say, dear?" </p>
<p>Periwinkle mother raised her voice to a bellow. "WHAT IS IT, AUNTY!"</p>
<p>"WHAAAAAAAT?" Yelled the matchmaker. </p>
<p>The mother opened her mouth to reply, but the matchmaker waved her hand dismissively. </p>
<p>"Just kidding, honey. My hearing's bad but not that bad." She grinned that grin old people made when they thought they'd done something particularly funny. A jovial lilt colored her body language. Periwinkle mother looked irritable but said nothing.<br/>
"Your children are extremely compatible, Ox and Rooster. The gods will bless you with many grandchildren. "</p>
<p>Periwinkle seemed to soften at that. Her husband touched her hand affectionately, then smiled for the first time in three hours. "Perhaps we've been too harsh. Zhao Dongmei would make a fine wife for our son."</p>
<p>Mother Zhao's bottom lip trembled. A fire began to broil in her eye. The rabbit god knew that look. She was about to throw a massive fit. He threw a glare in her direction even though he knew she couldn't see him. Things were finally looking up in this damned marriage negotiation. No way, no how was she ruining this with her bad temper. </p>
<p>She opened her mouth to destroy the peace but Tu'er Shen was faster. With a snap of his fingers her mouth was sealed shut. Her husband looked at her strangely when she remained quiet but thought little of it. His wife was prone to pouting fits after all. He gave the matchmaker a considering look and spoke hesitantly. "Boys?"</p>
<p>The matchmaker nodded. "Lots of strong, healthy boys."</p>
<p>His face lit up. "Chen Honqi is a strong name for a strong man. He'll make a good husband for Zhao Dongmei. We must pick an auspicious day for their wedding!"</p>
<p>His wife looked furious and struggled to escape her husband's grasp but he only distractedly tightened his grip on her and began talking animatedly with the other family about the marriage details. His baby girl was getting married after all. Everything had to be perfect for her.</p>
<p>The rabbit god felt the tension melt off his shoulders. Good, a good job, he'd done well. Dongmei and Honqi could now live peaceful lives together. Still, he cast a wary glance at Madame Zhao. Probably best he left her mute for the rest of the marriage negotiations. It wouldn't do well if she blew her top.</p>
<p>Tu'er Shen leisurely ambled out of the matchmaker's house, his notice-me-not charm jangling sweetly on his ankle. Stepping outside, a great rush of everything assaulted his senses. The market was a nice place, lots of bright colors and mouth watering smells. It reminded Shen of his childhood spent peeking out from behind his mother's legs and outrunning trouble. Usually he liked it, but today it was just too much for him.</p>
<p>The smell of frying pig and fresh herbs made him feel nauseous and lightheaded. Even yummy Tanghulu didn't look very tasty. The vibrant colors and evening lighting stressed his sleep deprived eyes worsening his already awful headache. </p>
<p>Shen leaned against a sturdy wall and tried to center himself. His eyes watered and he rested his face in his palms exhaustedly. A cool breeze billowed out of the spring sky, washing over him. It should have eased the heat that had been bubbling under his skin all day, but it only seemed to worsen. The warmth of his own body was unbearable. </p>
<p>Shen wasn't an idiot. He knew he was probably ill with fever, but a little sickness was no reason not to work. Taking a deep breath, he opened his eyes and fished his scroll out of his sleeve. He unraveled it with trembling hands. There was only one more prayer on the list. A fisherman by the name Li Yong, who was unbearably lonely. He only wished for a companion, someone he could love and take care of.</p>
<p>He scoffed with sarcastic humor. "Once, I finish this I'll take the nap of the century." </p>
<p>No, he didn't believe himself, but it was a nice lie. Even if he found time in between work, there were matters he'd neglected in the spirit realm. </p>
<p>He sighed and watched the crowds pass him. Life seemed so soft for them, all flushed pink with laughter and happy with the company of their loved ones. Shen grew unbearably jealous ; it was an ugly green thing simmering in the pulse of his heart. He craved his own mortality with a fierce viciousness that surprised himself. </p>
<p>Saw a pair of lovers flirt shamelessly together and felt bitter for it. Looked at the dopey, lovestruck smile of the girl and couldn't stand it.  He wondered if he looked half so pathetic when he'd been with Cong Da and couldn't bear to see them anymore. Suddenly, all he could see were wives with their husbands. Loneliness so thick he could choke on it piled high in the back of his throat.</p>
<p>He'd only been in love once before, when he was a human. He'd died for that love, but it hadn't been a love worth dying for. Cong Da hadn't been anything Shen thought he was. Shen was inarguably a love god who was bad at love. The thought made him feel so small-he felt as though he'd shrunk three sizes too little. </p>
<p>What was he doing anyway, lollygagging in the market when there was a fisherman who needed a boyfriend stat? Silly him, best he get on that immediately. He stretched himself out of his daze, arching his spine to crack his back. As though hearing his thoughts about work two fairy-bluebirds swooped out of the sky and landed at his feet.</p>
<p>"No, no, no!" Shen groaned miserably. "Go away, with your evil papers and responsibility. I don't want it!!"</p>
<p>The birds only stared at him with a distinctly judgmental edge. One was a male with exotic black and royal blue feathering, the other a pale blue female. Each held a bundle of scrolls tied up with dull red ribbon. Tu'er Shen did not appreciate their judgment. He was a full grown immortal with a lot on his plate. The last thing he wanted to add to his growing list of issues was judgey birds.</p>
<p>Yawning sleepily, his shoulders slumped with defeat. "Leave them there."</p>
<p>The female bird shook herself out and gave the male bird a hard peck for looking too intently at her feathers then dashed into the sky. The male made a wounded sound then rushed after her.<br/>
The rabbit god snorted derisively at himself. Love was everywhere and as a love god there was nothing he could do to escape it.</p>
<p>🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰</p>
<p>The rabbit god was maybe touch sicker than he had originally thought. Back slumped on the compact earth, eyes watering, and vision blurring, Shen was willing to admit he might have overdone it. His lungs burning from coughing so hard he wondered if he'd popped a rib with all his aggressive hacking. </p>
<p>The prayer of a pubescent boy had dragged him four provinces over to a small town by the mountains. It'd been a nice prayer- so innocent in its nature that Shen had smiled despite feeling so awful. He wanted his first kiss.</p>
<p>Tu'er Shen was diligent in finding someone who'd treat the boy with the respect he deserved. It had gone great and the two of them were so adorable Shen thought his heart would melt into a soppy puddle. It was a bit like watching a puppy cuddle a kitten. </p>
<p>What had not been adorable was when Shen had finished the job, swiped the dust off his robes, and promptly walked face first into a tree trunk. He'd laid there a couple of minutes nursing a welt the size of a volcano and began rethinking his life decisions.  Five minutes and the most god awful coughing fit later and Shen was over it. He was going home.</p>
<p>Dragging himself up, he pulled out a black pearl from his sleeve. Carefully, Shen placed it in between his teeth and cracked it open with the power of his jaw. A blue haze swirled out of it, surrounding him. Tu'er Shen blinked once and by the time he opened his eyes he had passed from the mortal realm to the spirit realm.</p>
<p>The rabbit god stumbled disoriented and feverish and looked about. He had landed close to home. Shen recognized the too green foliage, the all encompassing trees reaching the sky, but he couldn't think. Couldn't think of anything over the pounding in his head. He fumbled his way home on shaky legs, muscle memory leading him more than his mind. Tu'er Shen tried to ignore the pain of his welt, the pain of his headache, the severity of his too hot skin.</p>
<p>When he made it to his humble abode (well, humble for a god), he yanked his door open and staggered to bed. Tu'er Shen flopped on top of the sheets without ceremony. The rabbit god is passed out before his head even hits his pillow.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Easter!!<br/>Introducing my favorite character in this chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tu'er Shen woke up in a tumble of inky black hair, shadows chasing the lids of his eyes. Groggily, he rubbed his face, and bemoaned his bad luck to be awake. Shen felt as though he'd been hit by a pack of mules. Bones brittle and lungs sore, it seemed that good sleep was not enough to cure his illness. He must look like a wreck.</p><p>More than anything he wanted to sink back into the warmth of his bed and forget all his responsibilities. Shen was not that kind of god. Slipping from his bed to the dirt floor he took a good hard look around his burrow. He'd built his house with his own two hands. Dug into the rough dirt and created something cozy and homey. Too bad he was never home.</p><p>Dust carpeted most surfaces, the vanity, his amor, a couple of his pillows. The pink chrysanthemums he'd placed in an ornate vase had been reduced to crumpled petals and withered stems. He should probably employ a maid or two but couldn't stand the thought of someone else being in his home more than him. He'd clean when he found the time.</p><p>Shen padded over to the nearest window and drew it open with gentle hands. Mist drifted in, a watery blue haze blurring his sight. He took deep gulps of fresh air and smiled blissfully as damp air cooled his overheated skin. The rabbit god crooned a soft whistle into the fog. Soon enough a fairy bluebird swooshed out of the vapor and landed on the sill. </p><p>The bird gave him an expectant cluck and ruffled his feathers contemptuously. What an arrogant little thing. He threw the bird a petty scoff.<br/>Shen moved over to a stack of boxes next to the vanity and began rummaging about them. <br/>“No, no, not that one, the red one, where is the red one?" </p><p>Pushing aside a blue and green box he sneezed, disgruntled from all the dust he'd riled up. "Ah hah!"</p><p>He peeled open the lid revealing a pile of old parchment and a bottle of ink. Grabbing the writing materials, he wandered over to his vanity. In neat flowing brushstrokes he addressed the first letter to Gong Gong. All it said was,</p><p>I'm home. Bring medicine and food.</p><p>Shen signed with an extravagant flourish, rolled it up, and handed it to the bird. "That one goes to Kanghui, sea monster of the southern waters. "</p><p>The bird reared up to leave, but Tu'er Shen motioned for him to stop. With quick and efficient strokes, Shen wrote a second letter to Li Yin, the goddess of slander. They were close friends, but if anyone knew he was home before her she'd fly into a fury. She was a thing to be feared when her wrath had been tickled. There were few women in heaven who held as much power as her. A careless whisper slipped from her pink lips could tear a man down to his bones. He was lucky they got along so well.</p><p>Dear Li Yin,</p><p>Come for tea and snacks. I have a favor to ask of you.</p><p>Please hurry,<br/>Tu'er Shen</p><p>He handed that one to the bird abstinent mindedly.  "That one goes to the goddess of slander. You're dismissed."</p><p>The bird dashed out of the window and into the open air, bright colors swallowed by blue fog. Shen wondered suddenly if the bird had a family to go home to. It was spring after all. New chicks would be hatching from their eggs soon, chirping and fresh faced to the world they were born into. His own biological family was dead and had been for centuries. He'd be truly alone in the world if it weren't for Gong Gong, who treated him like the younger brother he'd always wanted.</p><p>The rabbit god slipped off the sparkling anklet he wore in the mortal realm and placed it on the vanity. The bells that jangled so sweetly, were notice-me-not charms, a little something extra to make sure mortals didn't notice what was best they forgot. Matchmaking was much smoother for all parties involved that way.</p><p>Soft footed, Tu'er Shen walked to his personal bathhouse feeling a bit like a ghost in his own home. Along the way his fingers trailing the walls. There were many paintings, offerings he'd of felt too guilty to get rid of, thanks from happy mortals, that had made his cheeks hurt from smiling so much. Some were stunning pieces worthy of the emperor himself, others like a toddler's first scribble. They all had their place on these walls regardless.  </p><p>Among those paintings, some stood out like an ox amidst a pool of lotus. These were Gong Gong's. Painting was perhaps the only gentle art he undertook, a juxtaposition to his title as a bringer of destruction. His art was unorthodox, wild in a way traditional art was gentle, still exceptionally beautiful, regardless. Gong Gong's artistry was emotional and thought provoking.  It'd leave itself seared into its viewer's mind. Unforgettable. Shen had always thought brother Gong Gong had lost his calling as a god of art. But then again Gong Gong was like family, maybe he was biased. </p><p>He coughed into his sleeve, throat raw, then sneezed from the dust on his sleeve. Tu'er Shen was so done with his life. The sooner he got well the better.</p><p>When Shen entered the bathhouse the first thing he did was tear off his day clothes.  He'd been wearing them for weeks and just the texture of them made him feel dirty. Work didn't give him much time for self care and he planned to use this forced break to his advantage. Drawing himself a bath of honey water and soothing herbs he began dumping every beauty remedy he owned into the hot water. More is better, right? </p><p>Shen plunked into the fragrant waters and began aggressively scrubbing himself clean. No dirt left alive on his watch. Once his skin was pink from his overzealous purge of filth, he lathered his dark hair with jasmine scented soaps until it was glossy again. Clean, Shen felt as though he could just take a minute to himself and enjoy the water. Sinking into the pool, he let his head drop back and closed his eyes.</p><p>He could imagine the scrolls piling up outside of his door right now, the longer he rested the more he'd have to do later. It couldn't be helped though, with as sick as he was he could start making mistakes. A mistake on his part could traumatize or ruin the happiness of some hapless mortal. </p><p>Distractedly, he began to draw letters in the water, watching ripples pool into ripples. Traced a heart into the liquid and watched it disappear. Love, love, love, love. It seemed like that was all he ever thought about these days. Kept seeing in his mind's eye that disgustingly romantic moment when a soulmate meets their other half. </p><p>He wants to be held in someone's stupidly too big arms. Wants to be in love again, yearns to float on the feeling of infatuation until his heart hurts, but more than that he wants to be loved in return. The rabbit god has seen so many happily ever afters that he couldn't help but wonder if he would ever get his own. A partner in crime, someone to share his days with. It all seemed so unreachable in the solitude of his bathroom. </p><p>Dreary, Shen rose up from the tub, long hair soaked, dripping down his back, rivets of water droplets running along the lines of his thighs.  Wrapping his hair tightly in a towel, he knots a second cloth securely around his waist. </p><p>When he returns to his bedroom, he gravitates toward the full length mirror. Inlaid with carvings of a great and terrible flood, it was one of the few things Tu'er Shen bought with his own money.  </p><p>With deft hands, he untied the towel around his head, letting ebony locks fall limply on his shoulders. Allowing the cloth around his hips to drop, he inspects his own nudity with sharp, critical eyes.</p><p>Plush lips, peachy white skin without flaw, complimented by the inky black of his hair that reached just beneath the curve of his ass. Almost feminine in his beauty. Bright, liquid honey eyes against a strong jawline. On a good day he was lean, on bad days he was thin.  Regardless he was always pretty. Fucked and had been fucked for the desirability of his features.</p><p>It made him want to smash something. Where were the scars from when he'd been beaten to death? Where were the marks left of him from when his skull had been crushed in and his face so mangled it became an unrecognizable mass of blood? Looking at his own body made him feel sick some days. The blessing of becoming immortal was that his body had healed. It hadn't healed everything. </p><p>Sometimes Shen wondered how he could have loved Cong Da. He was a disgusting man. But that was only a lie he told himself. Tu'er Shen knew how. </p><p>He hadn't fallen in love all at once. His love had been slow, warm like honey. Cong Da hadn't been traditionally handsome. But he was so so good - righteous down to his bones. A great and respectable tiger general to the imperial army.</p><p>Shen had tried to ignore him at first. But they worked together often. Shen was a soldier and a good one more times than not.</p><p>Cong Da seemed impossible to escape. And surely as the sun had risen into the sky his passion grew. It became a beautiful white lotus that he held close to his chest.</p><p>He couldn't help admire the strength of his shoulders, smile for the witty jokes Cong Da would pass to his ear. They became friends. Colors seemed brighter and summer days sweeter. The warmth in his chest, the love he harbored for Cong Da became so great it threatened to burst from him.</p><p>Until the day it did. Tu'er Shen drew Cong Da away from the rest and confessed his passion with all sweetness of a sugared water and hopefulness of a new day. Stuttering and sweet he'd stolen one chaste kiss from Cong Da. A quick pressing of lips there and then gone. </p><p>Cong Da had stepped back face all twisted in a grimace and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. A placating smile graced Cong’s lips.</p><p>Humiliation running up his neck, Shen recoiled as though inches apart defended him from Cong Da. It was mortifying really. Cong Da was no cutsleeve, Shen knew that. What had he thought would happen? That Cong would be so moved by his passion that he'd fall helplessly in love with him? He'd suddenly reveal his own secret affections for Shen? He was an idiot.</p><p>Cong Da was talking. Some useless drabble about the sickness of homosexuality. How Cong held him in no romantic light....ect, ect, ect. But Shen wasn't listening. His lungs felt as though they were filled with water. His ears covered in cotton and heart weighed down in stone. He prayed for the moment Cong would just stop talking. Leave, so he could forget this whole thing. </p><p>But Cong couldn't shut up. He just kept talking and talking. And as he spoke the malice in his body grew. A violence flickered in his gaze. His voice rose to a terrible roar. Shen couldn't hear him. Couldn't hear what he was saying over the whitewash of his fear. For the first time since he had met Cong he was afraid of him. But no, Cong wouldn't hurt him? Even if Cong didn't return his feelings, they were friends and Cong was a good man. He was lucky. Another man might kill him for the slight of being a cutsleeve. But not Cong. Cong was a good man. </p><p>Cong's hands were trembling. He had closed the distance between them. Shen could feel his breath. Cong was panting like a bull in the pen - BANG the burrow trembled at its foundation at the slam of a door, drawing Tu'er Shen out of his memories. </p><p>That would be Gong Gong, no doubt. "Shit, I think I broke your door. Did it always hang that way?" Hollered a masculine voice. Definitely Gong Gong.</p><p>"Probably not." Shen grumbled to himself. </p><p>"By the way there's a massive heap of scrolls outside your door. Do you want me to bring them in?"</p><p>Shen sighed exasperated then yelled back, "Put them in the kitchen."</p><p>"Where are you anyways?" The footsteps clunk about the house and the door slams shut.</p><p>Shen begins furiously rummaging for something comfortable and flattering to put on. "Dressing,  I'll be just a minute!"</p><p>"Your voice sounds congested. How sick are you?" Said Gong Gong worriedly. "I wasn't sure what type of medicine you needed so I bought all of it."</p><p>Shen smiled to himself. Gong Gong was such a kind soul it killed him sometimes. "Gēge, give me one second to breathe! We'll talk when I'm dressed."</p><p>More loud noises jumbled in the kitchen, pots and pans clanking together. Shen winced internally but ignored it to inspect clothing. Purple, he was feeling purple today. Picking out a vibrant grape colored garment with peony embroidery, he quickly threw it on before aggressively combing his hair. Braiding it half up, he placed a gold and ivory hairpin in the seam of the braid, powdered his face and lined his honeyed eyes. Good.</p><p>Shen followed the sound of crashing and loud feet to the kitchen. The sea monster was cutting carrots into heart shapes. Gong Gong looked up, dark eyes scrutinising him quietly.  "You look thin. When's the last time you ate?" Gruff voice concerned.</p><p>"What's the point of eating when I know it'll never be as good as your cooking. "</p><p>Gong Gong gave him a despairing look but said nothing. </p><p>"What are you making?" Shen questioned. Every part of the kitchen was covered in produce. Vegetables galore: fresh carp, rice, a fatty duck, ripe fruits, rice flour, three dozen eggs, and etcetera.</p><p>Gong Gong took a deep inhale. "Eight jeweled roast duck, vegetable stir fry, sweet and sour steamed fish, congee, a veggie dumpling, pork puns, shark fin soup, salad." Gong Gong breathed deep and continued."drunk chicken, flower cakes-"</p><p>Shen cut him off." Enough! Enough! Are you feeding two or the imperial palace? Don't you think that's too much?"</p><p>The sea monster gave him an incredulous look. "You need meat on your bones. Plus you only keep wine and dried dates stocked in your kitchen."</p><p>Shen tries to reply but is overcome by a coughing fit. He hacks miserably into his sleeve. "Shit." </p><p>Gong Gong wipes his hands on a towel and guides Shen to sit down. He begins checking his pulse and placing his palm on Shen's forehead. "Fucking hell, you're burning up. Any other symptoms?" </p><p>Shen tries to breathe between hacks but it only irritates makes his eyes water. "Headache,  nausea."  He grits out. </p><p>Gong Gong forces him to drink something bitter and disgusting.  Shen glares ungratefully at the bastard. "Nasty. Couldn't have given me something that wouldn't make my tongue fall out?"</p><p>The sea monster had the audacity to laugh at him."If your tongue doesn't fall out it's not working."</p><p>Shen huffs melodramatic. </p><p>"You're overdressed too.  You should be in bed, resting, not gallivanting about in fancy clothes."</p><p>"Yi Lin's coming over for tea and snacks later. I have business with Nüwa too. Then I have mortal prayers to attend after that." </p><p>Gong Gong's brows furrowed and his forehead wrinkles. "Fuck that, you're doing too much. Why won't you ever take a break?"</p><p>Shen flinched, and bit his lower lip. "They need me. " He said simply. </p><p>"Mortals have been falling in love for centuries whether gods interfere or not. They can survive you taking a day off." Gong said frustrated. </p><p>Shen knew that. "We'll just have to agree to disagree." He replies softly. How was he supposed to say that he wished someone had been there for him when he'd been a mortal? A guiding hand to turn him away from Cong when he'd been too naive to understand.</p><p>Gong Gong sighs, knowing the conversation is over and goes back to cutting vegetables into cute shapes. Even when Kanghui was doing something so adorable there was a power to him. A swimmers body - broad shouldered but lean, lucky red hair pulled up into a ponytail.  The air surrounding him smelled of saltwater, the brisk crack of thunder trembling across the ocean. His shoulders held the strength of the flood, and the threat of catastrophe. Malice, his eyes pooled with them. Gong Gong was a gatekeeper of a terrifying power. </p><p>It was ironic to him that if not for how they met, Gong Gong was the type of man Shen would be afraid of. Kanghui had saved him from drowning in the southern sea. Imagine the sea monster's shock when the cute brown bunny he'd found floating at the bottom of the ocean, and nursed to health was a love god. After that Shen hadn't really left, and well, here they are today. </p><p>"The Jade emperor is holding a banquet in honor of his daughter's betrothal. Every god and goddess in the spiritual realm must attend for fear insulting his majesty. " Kanghui comments. He's moved on to making the dough, furiously mixing ingredients like they've insulted his mother's name.</p><p>"All except you."</p><p>Gong Gong smiles cocky. "I'm a god of destruction. The one who tore the pillars of creation until all it was was rubble and dust. What idiot invites an omen of evil to their door?"</p><p>"You want me to bring back the stove god's secret recipe for chocolate."</p><p>"Damn right I do. The stingy bastard knows he owes me but won't pay up." Gong Gong snarls. "It's either he gives up the goods or I crush his house. Just bat your eyelashes at him some. He'll bend over backwards for a chance at your ass."</p><p>This startles a laugh out of Shen. "Gong Gong! He's straight as an arrow, and you know it."</p><p>"Not if you flirt with him, he won't be." The sea monster insists. "Come on please?"</p><p>Amused at his antics, Shen gives in. "Fine. Don't think this is going to become a thing though."</p><p>Gong Gong grins triumphantly. "Great and if he does anything weird remember that big brother Gong will snap his ribs and make a chair out of them for you."</p><p>Shen snorts. "Unnecessary, but duly noted."</p><p>The other god moves on to the duck, plucking its feathers and skinning it with frightening accuracy and aggression. "I bet Zhurong will flounce about the celebration, smug douche." Snarling bitterly he slices the bird down it's belly and removes it's guts. "He thinks he's better than me, doesn't even care about our history. Fucking oathbreaker...." Gong trails off ranting chaotically under his breath.</p><p>This was not the first time Shen had heard Kanghui's less than flattering opinions on the god of fire. Gong Gong disliked a lot of things. Mortals, people who are tall, gods, women in general, the use of the word catastrophe, the smell of badly brewed tea, animals with pink eyes, tongue clicking or finger tapping - but there was nothing that he despised more than Zhurong, god of fire. Sometimes this could lead to horrifying levels of absurdity. Like refusing to use a fireplace in the middle of winter because damn it that bastard had no right to intrude on his life. </p><p>"Keep talking about Zhurong and I'll think you're in love with him." Shen says offhandedly.</p><p>The red head pales. "That's not funny. I pray for the poor dunderhead of a woman who gets saddled with that mess of a god." He shivers dramatically. "Can you imagine the horror of having that ugly dick inside of you? It's a curse I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy."</p><p>Shen smiles indulgently, nodding every so often as Gong insults the fire god's heritage. Hmmm, uh huh, yep, if a boulder flew out of the sky and killed Zhurong obviously he would deserve it. Yepity yep yep. Slowly listening to the sea monsters prattle Shen realizes how tired he still is. Noticing that Tu'er Shen isn't paying attention, Gong Gong scowls. </p><p>"If you're so tired go get some shut eye. You're ill, rest'll be a priority."</p><p>Shen opened his mouth to argue but thought better of it. He could sleep while Gong Gong cooked and he waited for Yi Lin. "I'll be out front."</p><p>The rabbit god walks outside and finds a nice sunny patch of grass to rest his head. He shifts in one fluid motion into the form of a fluffy brown bunny, big ears dwarfing his small size. Cotton tail twitching, he flops on the ground and takes a great doze.</p><p>🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯🐇🐰🐯</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's that time of the month again. You know update time. New characters introduced. The plot thickens. Tu'er Shen is his typical mess. Oh and if you love this story give a Kudos, it means a lot!</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Shen plopped a delicious veggie dumpling in his mouth and munched grouchily. The flavors exploded on his tongue in a happy symphony, like his palette was a teenage boy having his first orgasm. The rabbit god eyed the plate of artfully arranged food suspiciously. Maybe Gong Gong was lacing his food with drugs.</p><p>He stuffed another one in his mouth, making his cheeks puff out in an undignified manner. Chomping in disdain he piled stir fry and roast duck on his plate into a great heap. Yi Lin was late. He had asked her to hurry and now it was sundown. Shen stabs a heart shaped carrot petulantly.</p><p>Gong Gong frowns, concern casting harsh lines on his jaw.<br/>"The food bad?"</p><p>Grumbling ."No, you've really outdone yourself." Shen finally stops stabbing the heart and shoves it in his mouth.<br/>" I didn't know carrots could taste so good." </p><p>The sea monster looks at him doubtfully, setting his own chopsticks haphazardly by his bowl of food." What's the problem then?"</p><p>"Yi Lin." Tu'er Shen carefully poured rice wine into his cup, clear liquid splashing over the rim. Hmm, he should buy bigger cups. <br/>" I needed her to find someone to deal with all my mortal prayers while I recover from sickness."</p><p>"I could do it. Can't be too hard can it?" Gong Gong muses idly. "Not like I have a real job anyways. No ones going to be knocking on my door askin’ me to destroy a couple more towns." He grabs a pretty white moonpie and devours it in one bite. "Sailors would be relieved. "</p><p>Shen winced. All he could see in his minds eye was Gong smashing heads together and screaming kiss. <br/>" That...that is very kind. I'll keep it in mind if no one else turns up."</p><p>Kanghui shrugs. "Your loss." And starts putting more food on Shen's plate.</p><p>"Gēge, I'm full." Shen pushes the plate away determinedly. " I couldn't eat another bite if I tried."</p><p>Gong Gong ignores him and continues putting food on Shen's plate. "Push through it. You'll never get a husband if you don't start putting meat on your bones. Men don't like boney asses." </p><p>"My ass isn't boney." Shen says exasperated.</p><p>"But it could be if you don't eat more." Gong Gong retaliates and places one more dumpling on the growing mound. </p><p>Shen eyes the food, savory smells wafting up into his nose. His mouth salivates. Well, Gong had a point - his ass could get boney if he didn't eat. He plucks a particularly yummy looking piece of fish up and nearly groans when it hits his taste buds. Ever since he became the rabbit god he's preferred vegetables but Gong Gong's cooking transcends normal circumstances. "No more that's enough for me. I really can't. I'll make myself even sicker than I already am."</p><p>The sea monster only nudges a bowl of steaming noodles toward him. "Fine but that's the last thing." Tu'er Shen says sternly. </p><p>"Fair enough." Gong Gong acquiesced.</p><p>Shen sipped demurly from his bowl of soup and let mind drift in the silence. He ought to look at those scrolls, take the time to sort out which prayers needed to be dealt with immediately and which could be pushed aside. Even thinking of it made his head begin to throb again.  </p><p>The rabbit god's eyes flickered up to where Gong Gong ate his meal. "Which daughter is getting married?"</p><p>"Huh?" Kanghui looks up bewildered. </p><p>"The banquet in the imperial palace? Which daughter is getting married?" </p><p>Gong Gong Gong's harsh features light up with understanding.  <br/>"Dunno." He taps his chin consideringly. </p><p>"Aye, maybe the one that prances about in all those yellows. The one that trembles a lot when you look at her too long. I think the poor dame might be broken."</p><p>A glint of something enters his eyes." Once I walked past her, and there must have been too strong a breeze, because she nearly swayed all the way over. "</p><p>Shen pauses mid sip. With a long suffering look he sets the noodles down. Gong Gong was banished from the heavenly palace, and by most opinions quite terrifying.  Her trembling probably had less to do herself and more to do with Kanghui misbehaving. </p><p>"You know what, nevermind. I'll ask Yi Lin when she gets here," Shen sniffs haughtily.</p><p>Loud laughter tumbles from Gong Gong's mouth. "Oh, I'm sure she'll know a good bit more than what's actually happening."  </p><p>Tu'er Shen grins. "Isn't that what makes her fun?" </p><p>The sea monster snorts. "If your idea of fun is chittering on."</p><p>Shen downs his cup of wine in a single swallow, hiding his mouth with his sleeve primly.  "Curb your bold tongue. Lest she may hear us and curse us both with a wild reputation." He declares dramatically.</p><p>Gong Gong just raises an eyebrow.<br/>"And how much wilder can she make my reputation?" He says incredulously. "Ah I know, now in addition to being the great flood bringer I'll also eat young babes in their cribs."  Chewing consideringly on a wolfberry, he adds as an afterthought.<br/>"Stop drinking so much. You're sick enough without liquor's help. " </p><p>"Hmff, then curb your tongue for my reputation. A wild one is the last thing I need."  <br/>A faint knocking echoes through the house. They both freeze, eyes wide.  Gong Gong is first to speak. "Fuck she's here."</p><p>In a swish of purple, Shen grabbed the first sealed jar of alcohol he saw and glided to the door. He moves to open it, then pauses. Turning to look Kanghui in the eyes he gestures to himself. <br/>"How do I look?"</p><p>"Like a daisy." Gong Gong replied dryly. </p><p>Swirling back around he opens the door without a second thought. The goddess looking back at him has a sweet round face, and a cruel mouth. Her hair, a waterfall of dark brown is done up in a series of ever complexing braids. Pretty jewels, twinkling bells,and skillful metal work, peak out, glimmering. Her soft curved body was artfully layered in peach brocade and gauzy scarves twined about her arms. She ought to have looked like a fae, effortless and pristine. Instead, Tu'er Shen found her unsettling. He felt bad for it as she was his friend but couldn't quite shake the thought. </p><p>"Took your time about it." She says, pink lips pressed into a thin line. </p><p>"Not as much as you."</p><p>She smiles at that. "Ah, well we're both here now."</p><p>The rabbit god closes the door behind him and gestures for her to follow. He leads her to a small outdoor area. What was once a garden, had now become one with the forest, overgrown and wild. In the center rested a stone table. They both sit quietly.  The last of the sun was dipping below the horizon, casting outstretched shadows in the orange glow. They seemed to claw and grasp at all they could touch, but the air was crisp here so he didn't mind it. Still, the shadows only served to make Yi Lin look more strange.</p><p>Shen picks up the jar and drinks it straight, savoring the burn in his throat. Huh, odd taste. Prickly, but with a smooth finish. Must be the Dragon's Breath he bought off the hag near the underworld. He'd have to buy some more when he got the chance. Hags always made the best liquor. Shen pushes the jar to her. She takes it silently and peers at the pink liquid inquiringly. Then she takes swig. Her face crinkles. <br/>"I don't like it." <br/>"You hate new things."<br/>"There are no new things. It's all the same to me."<br/>Tu'er Shen's mouth quirks up amused. <br/>The goddess frowns at him then sighs. "What's this favor you need anyways? I'm surprised to see you in the spiritual realm."<br/>"Let's not speak of it yet. Tell me about this banquet I keep hearing of."</p><p>Her almond  eyes brighten. " I can't wait!! Can you imagine all the lies that will be told? The love triangles, the jealous singles, the slighted guests!" Yi Lin's eyes get dreamy.  " The webs I'll spin and the drama I'll cause!" </p><p>Her voice lowers inconspicuously.<br/>"The mortal she's marrying, I hear 12th princess isn't even in love with him. Some big war hero that impressed the Jade Emperor. He Jia has never even met him.</p><p>Shen tilts his head, black hair dripping to the side. "It's not uncommon among mortal folks." </p><p>Darkness is falling, orange shifting to blackness. "But not among gods. The shame of not knowing my betrothed. Why I would die from it." She pauses, then seems to deflate all together again. <br/>"My father, god of irony, he's about ready to marry me off to the first man who asks." </p><p>Shen laughs at that. "And who’s so bold to ask? You worry for nothing." </p><p>Her countenance grows irritable. "The way I hear it the god of truth."</p><p>Shen snorts, his hand flys to his mouth in a desperate attempt to stop himself to giggling. </p><p>"It's not funny."</p><p>"It is, a little." </p><p>He nudges the Dragon's Breath towards her. She takes it and gulps it down, bells jingling as her head tipped back.  </p><p>A bird swoops down from the night. A bundle of scrolls plunk on the table. Head falls to hands. A miserable groan tumbles from Tu'er Shen's lips. Slump of a man he becomes one with the table. Yi Lin inclines her head as if to say go on. Let's have it. Pulling himself up he unravels one.  His eyes twitch when he reads the first line. Women, every name on this list is a woman.  <br/>"......this is a list of lesbian prayers." </p><p>Yi Lin giggles. Actually giggles.</p><p>"It's not funny." </p><p>She smiles. "It is, a little."  </p><p>The jar of alcohol is pushed towards him. He drinks it gratefully.</p><p>"Do I look like a lesbian to anyone? What does a gay man know about women." </p><p>"Can't be so different from any other relationship, now can it?"</p><p>He looks at her blankly. </p><p>"Okay so it's different." </p><p>He grabs another scroll and tears it open. Steam blows out of his ears. More women. <br/>"Where are these coming from?'' He fumes. </p><p>Yi Lin blinks. "Well, Nüwa obviously." </p><p>He pinches his temple, and looks up at the sky. The stars wink back at him, floating in the dark mass. Nüwa wasn't his favorite goddess, wasn't his favorite anything really. She was a sharp woman, all angles, sharper still her tongue . They were both love gods. Her being goddess of marriage and him of homosexuality.  She was older, ancient as any god got, more powerful, more capable, more loved, more everything really. As such she thought of herself, perhaps rightly, better than him. </p><p>"Why is she sending these to me?" He feels tired all the sudden. Fatigue sinks beneath his skin. It fits snuggly and makes a home. The liquor and night air had lost its appeal .</p><p>"She said she was busy and had no time for such relationships."</p><p>Throbbing swells behind his temple, his headache making an encore.<br/>"But I do." Exhale."I'll just have to talk to her." Although he was already dreading their meeting. </p><p>Honey gold eyes peer at Yi Lin. "The favor I wanted to ask of you. I have things to take care of in the spiritual realm, but I can't neglect the humans who rely on me. </p><p>Yi Lin looks at him for a moment, considering. Says nothing, then seems to come to a decision. "I know someone. I'll take care of it but you'll owe me." </p><p>Relief cycles through his head. "Thank you." They spend the rest of their time passing sips of Dragon's Breath back and forth in the dead of night. He never prayed anymore. It had lost its appeal when he became a god. Still, he wished fervently in his heart that fortune would smile on him.</p><p>🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰 🐯 🐰</p><p>When Shen arrived at Nüwa's Palace, everything was a buzz. Servants ran, panicked back and forth. They lugged bolts of luxurious fabric and carts of prayer scrolls.  Some sat in the grass, brows furrowed, lips bitten, as they furiously arranged flowers and garland. Every so often a red clothed man or woman would dash to the gate and disappear in a fission of smoke. Off to run errands or answer prayers. In a flash the red workers would reappear, grab a satchel of prayers before disappearing again. Snippets of conversation whizzed past his ears. </p><p>"Who's sewing He Jia's wedding veil!?"</p><p>"These flowers are wilted. Throw them out."</p><p>"Fuck, someone took the district five prayers instead of district 10."</p><p>Floral perfumes mixed with the sweaty, panicked smell of the workers. Desperation was thick in the air. The love god wandered around dizzily. Should he ask for help? He stuck out like a sore thumb. His elaborate purple robes against a fizzling of pink and red. A servant knocks into him." Watch it." They hiss. <br/>Shen tries to tug on a pink robed maid. "Err .. some help please?" They ignore him.</p><p>Tu'er Shen hated the Palace of a Thousand Hearts, so so much. He was a god. Couldn't he get a little respect?</p><p>He must have look especially lost and pathetic because a teenager stops him. The boy was all gangly and nervous faced. His hair, black is thrown up messily and he wears a pastel pink uniform. "Err...Sir only gods and servants are allowed here." </p><p>His eyes twitch. “I am a god." </p><p>"Oh!!" The boy startles. "Really, I meant no offense....it's just well, you really don't look....Like well..." </p><p>Sigh. The poor thing looks about ready to have a heart attack. "Take me to Nüwa." Shen interrupts.</p><p>"Absolutely, right this way."</p><p>The teen leads him through corridor after corridor. Everything is a lavish red, rubies inlaid the walls, spider lilies spout from the floors, lanterns glow from ropes of camilla garland. Tu'er Shen hadn't felt it before, but it was clear to him now. Nüwa's power thrummed in everything here. Like a hummingbird it vibrated from spot to spot,a small shimmering presence. To the workers it probably felt warm and persuasive,to him it burned territorially. It was uncomfortable. Made him want to walk away from this place and never turn back. </p><p>The boy stops, hair bouncing with his movements. The entrance is covered by a swath of wine red curtains. "Through here." He whispers, hand cupped over mouth. <br/>They enter. </p><p>Nüwa is just as flawless as ever. Her cheek bones look like sculpted glass, skin white jade and luminous. Hair, voluminous and dark as soot and ash, was like spun silk. Her appearance screamed opulence. A headdress of cream pearls and rose gold sat elegantly on her head as polished cinnabar dangled from her delicate ears. A baby sat on her hip, his tubby hands gripping on the embroidered fabric of his mother's dress. He looked on all accounts just like her. The same slim nose and slitted snakelike eyes. The largest difference was that while the baby had two cute chubby feet, a grey snake's tail slithered  beneath Nüwa's dress. </p><p>The teen hurriedly bows to her. She narrows her eyes on the rabbit god. "Tu'er Shen, how delightful for you to visit me." She demurs in a low hiss. </p><p>A sardonic smile. "It is a delight"</p><p>They choose to kneel at the table. Nüwa beckons the anxious teen to pour them tea. As the boy pours, Shen can feel the teen's gaze lingering on him. He observes the slight flush on his cheeks. Oh, so that's how it is? Slowly, seductively he licks the seam of his pink lips. The boy flushes entranced, unable to look away. Then Shen winks cheekily.  The teen's face turns fuchsia with mortification and he scurries off as quickly as possible.</p><p>"Don't play with my servants." Comes Nüwa's harsh reprimand. </p><p>"It's not my fault he reeks of bisexual lust."</p><p>"Bah!! Bah!" Concurred Baby, eyes wide and unseeing as if to say, "Ah yes! What the pretty man with the gorgeous hair said!" Nüwa wasn't amused. Well, she never had a good sense of humor.</p><p>The tea steamed, it's grey twirls dancing playfully where it sat.  Shen pouts. "Do I look like a woman to you?"</p><p>"What." She says affronted. </p><p>"Perhaps it's my jawline." He muses lightly. "Or my womanly figure?" He gestures to his waistline. </p><p>Nüwa looks about ready to kill him. Pretty face all marred up by a nasty sneer. "No?" He smiled nefariously. "So you know I am a man?" Idly, Shen thinks that if it weren't for baby babbling happily in her coiled lap she would’ve summoned a knife to kill him. It certainly wouldn't have been the first time. He figured she wasn't trying too hard. She didn't want the added grind of his workload. "Oh, I get it! You must think I'm straight." </p><p>Her eyes narrow to slits irritably. "Not that either? He hmms condescendingly. Pulling a handful of scrolls from his sleeves he dumps them on the table. "So what makes you think I know enough about women to match every lesbian couple on the mortal plane?" </p><p>She smiles. It's all grit and venom.<br/>"When a man falls in love, he cries out my name, and when a woman's husband scorns her , she cries out my name. They pray to me day and night for their daughters, for their brothers, for themselves. Emperors, Nobles, Empresses and hero's, even gods come to my altar wailing and crying, leaving their battered hearts at my feet. And what do you do? Match a pauper? Teach them how to take a cock? Help some old pervert fulfill his sex fantasy? Can't you at least manage this?"</p><p>Her son grabs a headdress and gnaws it gummily. Shen should be angry, should be furious really. He didn't care. He'd heard it all before and heard far worse than this. Instead he rests his chin on his hand. Beneath his lashes, he gives her a languid unimpressed stare. "I don't do your work for you. Have your servants do it. Or petition for a new goddess to be appointed."</p><p>"If you don't answer these prayers, no one will." She seethes. </p><p>Abruptly he stands. "We're done here." With smooth measured steps he walks towards the exit. His hand parts the curtains, when he hears Nüwa's voice in a passive hiss. </p><p>"You were in love right? I think I remember him....Cong Da." Her words come out in mocking, a vile tilt. His heart stops, then thrashes uncomfortably. </p><p>"You know, he got married. Had three kids. It was strange. The resemblance between you and his wife was uncanny. Like looking at a portrait.'' </p><p>Shen felt sick. A trembling makes its way into his hand.</p><p>"But it's probably for the best. You aren't exactly marriage material. Barely could understand love, how could you have held a marriage together?" </p><p>Then his hand is trembling for a completely different reason. White hot fury. Couldn't have a marriage? Wasn't capable ? Fuck her. <br/>He was going to get married and the wedding was going to be bigger than any piece of shit she planned. The rabbit god stormed out in a whirl of purple.</p>
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